10.30.2011

Robert Stack's voice still haunts us

We suspect that if you ask any Generation Xer about the things that most scared and scarred their childhood, NBC's "Unsolved Mysteries" would crack the top ten. We certainly had trouble watching the show when our parents were gone. And Mrs. Cheese Fy just had a unmistakably panicky emotional reaction when she noticed us composing this post and looking for the clip below on YouTube: "Where are you doing? No way."

It's not just the eerie, relentless, synthesizer-heavy theme song that's been seared into our memory. And it's not just the terrifying stories of people who just, like, disappeared into thin air or met a gruesome death (we still remember the story of a guy who vanished and whose car later turned up abandoned with the doors open and the keys in the ignition at an interstate rest stop - the authorities could only speculate who left it there and why and where the owner went) - people just like you and your parents. No one is safe. It was also host Robert Stack's gravel-voiced, poker-faced narration that remained flat and dispassionate no matter how horrible the stories became. This was TV's Eilot Ness, after all, telling us that the cops couldn't do it alone and needed your help. How scary is that?

Happy Halloween. And sweet dreams.

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