1. It's pretty good. Definitely an upgrade from 2008's Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull, which was a complete mess. This one should have been the fourth one.
2. We really don't understand the bad reviews. Were expectations too high?
3. The biggest criticism we could maybe offer is the whole question of why it was made. But should that sort of thing factor into a review of the quality of the finished film? Should critics focus only on the art or should they take into account the narrative surrounding how and why the art was created?
4. The movie certainly embraces Harrison Ford's age (he's 80). We noticed several shots of Indy walking away from the camera linger on his old man shuffle-limp and there's more than one scuffle that a younger Raiders of the Lost Ark-era Indy would have been handled no problem, but here he's surprisingly weak and clumsy.
5. We're not sure about including another underage, Short Round-style, street kid sidekick.
6. We heard the ending was wild, but it's... really wild. We figured we had an idea what to expect, but we were totally wrong. It's fun to be surprised.
7. The train prologue may go on a little too long, but it's a slam-bang action sequence very much in line with what you'd see in the earlier movies.
8. The last scene got to us. We didn't have to wipe a tear, but we sure came close. You'll know it when you see it.
9. Another great "Indy's getting old" moment comes when he's giving a lecture to a classroom full of bored students, a stark contrast to the students (especially the female students making goo-goo eyes) in the earlier movies who were paying rapt attention.
10. Then again, as a friend pointed out, hitting the "Indy's getting old" angle so hard may be a turnoff for some. Who wants to spend two hours contemplating the looming mortality of one of Hollywood's greatest hero characters?
11. There's also the issue of whether younger moviegoers even know who Indiana Jones is. We took the Little Fries to see it, but would they have gone on their own if given a choice? We've dutifully showed them the first three movies, which they liked, but it's not really in their bones like it is might be for Generation X who came of age with Indiana Jones.
12. They cast Antonio Banderas for that role?
13. It's good that they also gave a strong arc to Phoebe Waller-Bridger's character, who starts the movie undertaking these adventures solely as a way to get rich and get out of debt. Shades of Han Solo, in fact.
14. The "de-aging" CGI magic that creates new flashback footage of Harrison Ford as he looked thirty years ago is pretty good, but it still has a bit of that "uncanny valley" quality at times. That said, you get used to it pretty quickly. It does the trick.
15. It's not an Indiana Jones movie without him riding on a horse, deciphering some crazy clues in an ancient language, or crawling through a booby-trapped underground catacomb. Check, check, and... check.
Updated Indiana Jones movie rankings -
1. Raiders of the Lost Ark (1981), obviously
2. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989), obviously
3. Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom (1984), by a hair and if you argued Dial of Destiny is better we wouldn't argue
4. Indiana Jones and the Dial of Destiny (2023)
and then...
5. Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull (2008) - we still can't believe that stupid title
Our (current) favorite Indiana Jones quotes - if you know, you know
* "He chose... poorly."
* "It's not the years, honey. It's the mileage."
* "It belongs in a museum!"
* "Give me the whip!"
* "Nothing to fear here." "That's what scares me."
* "Indiana, let it go."
* "You lost today, kid, but that doesn't mean you have to like it."
* "Bad dates."
* "I don't know, I'm making this up as I go."
* "Snakes. Why did it have to be snakes?"
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