2.17.2013
Blurry boys, blurry boys
This article from Entertainment Weekly's Dan Snierson about the post-production technician who blurs out the naughty bits on Fox's "Cops" is exactly the sort of genius pop culture investigation that the Cheese Fry loves. We wish we'd thought of it.
2.01.2013
Knee-jerk review: FX's "The Americans"
1. Did we just find a new favorite show? It may be too soon to tell, but we have very high hopes. We will be back for more.
2. We've always been rather lukewarm on Kerri Russell, but she is no joke here as a fierce, rigid, rather humorless KGB agent pretending to be an all-American housewife. She's got the goods.
3. Is "In the Air Tonight" still a powerful song in its own right (those are some seriously dark, foreboding lyrics) or is it more of a lazy way to reference the 1980s? Should any serious producer ever include Phil Collins on a soundtrack unless there's clear irony present? These are the questions we ask ourselves.
4. Speaking of music, what was that song that played over the opening operation? Catchy and strange.
5. Remember pay phones?
6. Has there ever been a sub-par FX drama? Even flops like "Dirt" or "Lights Out" were visionary and fearless in their own way. This is what the freedom of cable broadcasting provides writers and producers.
7. That's some serious damage done by a barbecue fork. Remind us not to ever make creepy sexual overtures to the underage daughter of a secret KGB agent.
8. Agreed, it's a pretty big coincidence that the FBI agent moves in right across the street, but we'll allow it given the conflict and tension such an arrangement will surely create. It's easy to see the KGB agent and the FBI agent becoming friends, which will add another layer of complications for everyone.
9. Clever also that the writers painted the FBI agent as a habitually suspicious character, thus explaining why he does the rather extreme things he does at the end of the pilot.
10. It's a very strange feeling indeed to be rooting for the Evil Empire.
2. We've always been rather lukewarm on Kerri Russell, but she is no joke here as a fierce, rigid, rather humorless KGB agent pretending to be an all-American housewife. She's got the goods.
3. Is "In the Air Tonight" still a powerful song in its own right (those are some seriously dark, foreboding lyrics) or is it more of a lazy way to reference the 1980s? Should any serious producer ever include Phil Collins on a soundtrack unless there's clear irony present? These are the questions we ask ourselves.
4. Speaking of music, what was that song that played over the opening operation? Catchy and strange.
5. Remember pay phones?
6. Has there ever been a sub-par FX drama? Even flops like "Dirt" or "Lights Out" were visionary and fearless in their own way. This is what the freedom of cable broadcasting provides writers and producers.
7. That's some serious damage done by a barbecue fork. Remind us not to ever make creepy sexual overtures to the underage daughter of a secret KGB agent.
8. Agreed, it's a pretty big coincidence that the FBI agent moves in right across the street, but we'll allow it given the conflict and tension such an arrangement will surely create. It's easy to see the KGB agent and the FBI agent becoming friends, which will add another layer of complications for everyone.
9. Clever also that the writers painted the FBI agent as a habitually suspicious character, thus explaining why he does the rather extreme things he does at the end of the pilot.
10. It's a very strange feeling indeed to be rooting for the Evil Empire.
Six movies released in 2012 we didn't see in a theater
With appropriate gratitude to Time Warner Cable's "On Demand" service, we give you six movies we wanted to see in theaters last year but could not due to the Li'l Frys.
1 Battleship is Pearl Harbor meets Transformers, which we intend as the worst possible insult imaginable. A loud, stupid, formulaic train wreck of a movie that never met a cliche it didn't want to run right into the ground. We were shocked by how boring and tedious so much of it truly was given the multi-million-dollar visual effects. Even if it's empty-headed, shouldn't it be fun? Not even Liam Neeson escapes unscathed. Up to now, we'd been big fans of director Peter Berg. He'll have to win us back over now.
2 End of Watch strings together visceral, gritty moments of life as an LAPD street cop working the worst neighborhoods. There's no doubt the movie is doing an expert job of showing us what it's really like out there. Writer-director David Ayer has practically made a career out of making movies about urban cops (if you haven't seen Training Day, what are you waiting for?). The problem is that you keep waiting for a plot that never arrives. Things start to unravel towards the end as it becomes clear our heroes have stumbled onto some kind of cartel operation and things end in a predictably bloody climax. But up until then, mostly it's just a this-happed, then-this-happened episodic sort of story. It's well-made, sure. It just doesn't add up to anything. What was the point?
3 Looper reminds us how hard it is to tell a good time-travel story. Filmmakers can easily get completely sidetracked by endless paradoxes and distracting plot holes. But when it's done right, there's something weirdly primal about the ability to go back and change the past (or keep it from being changed by some nefarious future). It's why The Terminator and Back to the Future are such beloved classics. Looper doesn't hit those highs, but it comes close, mostly because it doesn't spend a whole lot of time on time travel mechanics. Instead, the movie puts two versions of the same character together and then watches the fallout: a young man (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) faces his future, an older man (Bruce Willis) faces his past. Both can only survive if the other is destroyed. It's more drama than sci-fi. There's a lot here that's quite genius. People have quibbled about the "impossible" ending, but as catharsis, it's perfect.
4 Magic Mike is probably one of the very best melodramas you'll ever see about ambition. How much are you willing to pay for fame and fortune? When do youthful dreams give way to more adult realities? At what point do you cut your losses and accept your fate? Director Steven Soderbergh is our very favorite filmmaker and so it's no surprise that he's cranked out - in our eyes - another mini-masterpiece of mood, character, and style. The camera angles, the pacing, the performances, all top notch. We're finally starting to understand what all the fuss is about over Channing Tatum. Did we mention this is a movie about male strippers in Tampa, Florida and features Matthew McConaughey in full-on shirtless self-parody? Without question, this should be a laughable Lifetime TV movie clunker. And yet it is not.
5 Pitch Perfect may be a rip-off Fox's "Glee" in that both are about misfits who find identity, love, and purpose through school singing groups. But the movie improves on the Fox recipe. "Glee" can be frustratingly inconsistent, silly, and implausible, often turning itself in knots to hit big moments whether it all makes sense or not. Pitch Perfect doesn't have those problems, perhaps in part because it's happy to embrace the romantic comedy/misfit college comedy formula (uptight girl learns to let go, introverted angry chick opens up and finds love, underdogs triumph over the favorites, etc), rather than work so hard trying to upend them like "Glee." Sometimes, cliches work because they're tried and true. Anna Kendrick seems to be an acquired taste we haven't yet fully acquired, but the real standout is Rebel Wilson as Fat Amy.
6 Seeking a Friend for the End of the World wins points for fully committing to its apocalyptic premise, though the low-budget, indie-sensibility does sometimes undermine the film's realism, like when it's clear the producers couldn't afford a jet plane and had to settle for a prop plane. The movie mostly succeeds at walking a shaky line between two kinds of comedies: the dry black kind and the whimsical romantic kind. Keira Knightley (ridiculously pretty) plays the role of the Quirky Artsy Girl you've seen countless times before, while Steve Carrell does his usual sad-sack-with-a-mean-streak routine. Nothing new, really. But it's mixed together well. Lots of amusing cameos and detours.
1 Battleship is Pearl Harbor meets Transformers, which we intend as the worst possible insult imaginable. A loud, stupid, formulaic train wreck of a movie that never met a cliche it didn't want to run right into the ground. We were shocked by how boring and tedious so much of it truly was given the multi-million-dollar visual effects. Even if it's empty-headed, shouldn't it be fun? Not even Liam Neeson escapes unscathed. Up to now, we'd been big fans of director Peter Berg. He'll have to win us back over now.
2 End of Watch strings together visceral, gritty moments of life as an LAPD street cop working the worst neighborhoods. There's no doubt the movie is doing an expert job of showing us what it's really like out there. Writer-director David Ayer has practically made a career out of making movies about urban cops (if you haven't seen Training Day, what are you waiting for?). The problem is that you keep waiting for a plot that never arrives. Things start to unravel towards the end as it becomes clear our heroes have stumbled onto some kind of cartel operation and things end in a predictably bloody climax. But up until then, mostly it's just a this-happed, then-this-happened episodic sort of story. It's well-made, sure. It just doesn't add up to anything. What was the point?
3 Looper reminds us how hard it is to tell a good time-travel story. Filmmakers can easily get completely sidetracked by endless paradoxes and distracting plot holes. But when it's done right, there's something weirdly primal about the ability to go back and change the past (or keep it from being changed by some nefarious future). It's why The Terminator and Back to the Future are such beloved classics. Looper doesn't hit those highs, but it comes close, mostly because it doesn't spend a whole lot of time on time travel mechanics. Instead, the movie puts two versions of the same character together and then watches the fallout: a young man (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) faces his future, an older man (Bruce Willis) faces his past. Both can only survive if the other is destroyed. It's more drama than sci-fi. There's a lot here that's quite genius. People have quibbled about the "impossible" ending, but as catharsis, it's perfect.
4 Magic Mike is probably one of the very best melodramas you'll ever see about ambition. How much are you willing to pay for fame and fortune? When do youthful dreams give way to more adult realities? At what point do you cut your losses and accept your fate? Director Steven Soderbergh is our very favorite filmmaker and so it's no surprise that he's cranked out - in our eyes - another mini-masterpiece of mood, character, and style. The camera angles, the pacing, the performances, all top notch. We're finally starting to understand what all the fuss is about over Channing Tatum. Did we mention this is a movie about male strippers in Tampa, Florida and features Matthew McConaughey in full-on shirtless self-parody? Without question, this should be a laughable Lifetime TV movie clunker. And yet it is not.
5 Pitch Perfect may be a rip-off Fox's "Glee" in that both are about misfits who find identity, love, and purpose through school singing groups. But the movie improves on the Fox recipe. "Glee" can be frustratingly inconsistent, silly, and implausible, often turning itself in knots to hit big moments whether it all makes sense or not. Pitch Perfect doesn't have those problems, perhaps in part because it's happy to embrace the romantic comedy/misfit college comedy formula (uptight girl learns to let go, introverted angry chick opens up and finds love, underdogs triumph over the favorites, etc), rather than work so hard trying to upend them like "Glee." Sometimes, cliches work because they're tried and true. Anna Kendrick seems to be an acquired taste we haven't yet fully acquired, but the real standout is Rebel Wilson as Fat Amy.
6 Seeking a Friend for the End of the World wins points for fully committing to its apocalyptic premise, though the low-budget, indie-sensibility does sometimes undermine the film's realism, like when it's clear the producers couldn't afford a jet plane and had to settle for a prop plane. The movie mostly succeeds at walking a shaky line between two kinds of comedies: the dry black kind and the whimsical romantic kind. Keira Knightley (ridiculously pretty) plays the role of the Quirky Artsy Girl you've seen countless times before, while Steve Carrell does his usual sad-sack-with-a-mean-streak routine. Nothing new, really. But it's mixed together well. Lots of amusing cameos and detours.
1.24.2013
Knee-jerk review: "Lincoln"
1. It's one of those movies that knows it's, like, really really important. Makes it a bit stiff.
2. It's also one of those movies that literally put us to sleep. It makes us feel like an uncultured, unwashed hooligan, but we can't lie to you. We fought it as best we could, but there was definitely a snore or two ripping through the auditorium. We used to get the same feeling back in the days when we had to watch foreign films at film festivals. They may have been profound and artful, but they had no concept of pacing and urgency. Those... things... dragged.... along.
3. The first hour here is rather tedious and sloggy, full of white men standing around in old costumes and crazy hair and pontificating.
4. The last 90 minutes... better. We stayed awake.
5. We'd like to think it was the full meal we'd just had or the medicine we took or the horrible seats we were stuck with. But then again, it could be that it was just dull.
6. Things perk up considerably when the movie moves away from the drawing room oratory and into something that involves, you know, conflict. The sequences involving the boisterous, cranky House of Representatives are compelling. You know the current members of that august body would love to have the chance to openly boo and insult one another as is depicted here.
7. We're also curious to see the movie that Spielberg only hints at in a couple of moments, the one that shows the horror of the Civil War with the same unblinking fascination with the violence men commit that gave such an undercurrent of dread to Saving Private Ryan.
8. Daniel Day Lewis. We get it. He's amazing. But there's something a little mannered and forced about his performances, don't you think? It's never as effortless and charming as, say, Meryl Streep.
9. On the bright side, the last mainstream Hollywood movie to put us to sleep in the theater was Gladiator and that won the Oscar for Best Picture. You're welcome, Steve.
10. You can tell the script was written by a playwright. There's a clear love of language and words. But there's also a theatrical, stage-bound quality to the action.
11. The broad strokes of the plot are intriguing, no question. The back-room deals and compromises and white lies and arm twisting and threats needed to end slavery. These are the kind of machinations that make the government run. We wish more of this sort of thing happened today. Too much of Washington is pitched to the TV cameras and talk radio shows. But we digress.
11. Weird how everyday citizens could have a meeting with the president back then.
12. Maybe we'll see it again some day. But we still have yet to rewatch Gladiator.
1.21.2013
"No, Mr. Bond, I expect a sizable return on my investment!"
Vulture.com recently explored the economic feasibility of some of the James Bond movie villain plans. No word on the financial impact of using a nuclear weapon to hold the world hostage (Thunderball), blowing up Berlin (Octopussy), or creating super races (Moonraker).
1.19.2013
Top ten 1980s all-slow-dance prom DJ playlist
Richard Marx, "Hold on to the Night"
The Bangles, "Eternal Flame"
Richard Marx, "Endless Summer Nights"
Phil Collins, "Groovy Kind of Love"
INXS, "Never Tear Us Apart"
Vanessa Williams, "Dreamin"
Peter Cetera and Amy Grant, "The Next Time I Fall"
Breathe, "How Can I Fall"
Bon Jovi, "Never Say Goodbye"
Deion Estes, "Heaven Help Me"
We're not proud of it, but it is what it was.
The Bangles, "Eternal Flame"
Richard Marx, "Endless Summer Nights"
Phil Collins, "Groovy Kind of Love"
INXS, "Never Tear Us Apart"
Vanessa Williams, "Dreamin"
Peter Cetera and Amy Grant, "The Next Time I Fall"
Breathe, "How Can I Fall"
Bon Jovi, "Never Say Goodbye"
Deion Estes, "Heaven Help Me"
We're not proud of it, but it is what it was.
What we'll miss most about Fox's "Fringe"
* Anna Torv's ponytail.
* The gruff professionalism of Agent Broyles.
* The dirigibles of Earth-2.
* Red licorice.
* The creepy, dead-eyed soullessness of the Observers, though we did always appreciate their retro attire and the slow, careful way they put on and took off their fedoras.
* The hubris of Walter Bishop and how his decision to steal his son's double almost destroyed not one, but two, universes. We're pretty sure that qualifies as an "unintended consequence."
* The feeling of being in an exclusive club of passionate fans. There was simply no way for someone unfamiliar with the show to drop in and sample an episode or two once the series got rolling, not with parallel universes and time-reboots. You'd sound like a crazy person just trying to explain all of the twists and turns. If you watched it, you got it. You were one of the few.
* The genius of John Noble. It's a great role and Noble knew it. Knocked it out of the park time and again. But Emmy would rather consider the overrated Hugh Laurie every year and that guy who plays Dexter.
* The perky patience of Astrid Farnsworth.
* Those giant floating words.
* The fearsome bad-assery of telekinetic Olivia Dunham.
* Repeated references to the wonder drug cortexiphan. We'll have to find ways to keep using the word in our everyday life. Won't be easy.
* Enjoying the thoughtful, literate episode recaps by Entertainment Weekly's Jeff Jensen.
* The whole alternate-universe season (number 3, if you're keeping track) that played so skillfully with the doubling of the series characters. This is a show that explored every angle of its gimmick premises.
* The white tulip postcard.
* Massive Dynamic. How scary-sounding does that company sound? What don't we do?
* The whole concept of amber as a tool not only to stop time-space fractures, but also to facilitate suspended animation. So clever. And so visual.
* The villainy of actor Michael Copsa.
* The patience of a major television network that could have easily pulled the plug on this show years ago. You can see the viewer numbers dwindle season by season, episode by episode. We'd like to think this is a sign of things to come as audiences become more fragmented and acclaimed-but-low-rated cable shows like "Breaking Bad" and "Justified" change the business model. But it's probably too soon to tell.
* The weird "glyphs" that closed each act and supposedly spelled a word linked to the episode plot.
* Season 5's gonzo decision to set every single episode in a distant dystopian future run by far-future-invaders. Audacious. But then, this was a show remaking itself every season. Sort of the same way "Lost" did, although we refuse to compare the two because of the disappointing, time-wasting fizzle that was "Lost's" final season.
* The way the show did science fiction the way it's supposed to be done, by using outlandish situations and crazy technology to ask big, weighty questions about what makes us who we are and what it means to be human.
* All those clever variations on the opening title sequence.
Entertainment Weekly counts down the show's best 19 episodes.
* The gruff professionalism of Agent Broyles.
* The dirigibles of Earth-2.
* Red licorice.
* The creepy, dead-eyed soullessness of the Observers, though we did always appreciate their retro attire and the slow, careful way they put on and took off their fedoras.
* The hubris of Walter Bishop and how his decision to steal his son's double almost destroyed not one, but two, universes. We're pretty sure that qualifies as an "unintended consequence."
* The feeling of being in an exclusive club of passionate fans. There was simply no way for someone unfamiliar with the show to drop in and sample an episode or two once the series got rolling, not with parallel universes and time-reboots. You'd sound like a crazy person just trying to explain all of the twists and turns. If you watched it, you got it. You were one of the few.
* The genius of John Noble. It's a great role and Noble knew it. Knocked it out of the park time and again. But Emmy would rather consider the overrated Hugh Laurie every year and that guy who plays Dexter.
* The perky patience of Astrid Farnsworth.
* Those giant floating words.
* The fearsome bad-assery of telekinetic Olivia Dunham.
* Repeated references to the wonder drug cortexiphan. We'll have to find ways to keep using the word in our everyday life. Won't be easy.
* Enjoying the thoughtful, literate episode recaps by Entertainment Weekly's Jeff Jensen.
* The whole alternate-universe season (number 3, if you're keeping track) that played so skillfully with the doubling of the series characters. This is a show that explored every angle of its gimmick premises.
* The white tulip postcard.
* Massive Dynamic. How scary-sounding does that company sound? What don't we do?
* The whole concept of amber as a tool not only to stop time-space fractures, but also to facilitate suspended animation. So clever. And so visual.
* The villainy of actor Michael Copsa.
* The patience of a major television network that could have easily pulled the plug on this show years ago. You can see the viewer numbers dwindle season by season, episode by episode. We'd like to think this is a sign of things to come as audiences become more fragmented and acclaimed-but-low-rated cable shows like "Breaking Bad" and "Justified" change the business model. But it's probably too soon to tell.
* The weird "glyphs" that closed each act and supposedly spelled a word linked to the episode plot.
* Season 5's gonzo decision to set every single episode in a distant dystopian future run by far-future-invaders. Audacious. But then, this was a show remaking itself every season. Sort of the same way "Lost" did, although we refuse to compare the two because of the disappointing, time-wasting fizzle that was "Lost's" final season.
* The way the show did science fiction the way it's supposed to be done, by using outlandish situations and crazy technology to ask big, weighty questions about what makes us who we are and what it means to be human.
* All those clever variations on the opening title sequence.
Entertainment Weekly counts down the show's best 19 episodes.
1.06.2013
Ten context-free topics from a night of four beers, two bars
1. The filmography of Lars von Trier
2. Types of beer (i.e. IPA vs IRA) and where they're brewed
3. 48 frames-per-second
4. San Francisco immigrant culture and cuisine
5. The Nike corporate campus
6. "Murder hole"
7. TNT's "Southland" and Fox's "The Good Guys"
9. Bush v. Gore
10. The hapless Mitt Romney campaign
2. Types of beer (i.e. IPA vs IRA) and where they're brewed
3. 48 frames-per-second
4. San Francisco immigrant culture and cuisine
5. The Nike corporate campus
6. "Murder hole"
7. TNT's "Southland" and Fox's "The Good Guys"
9. Bush v. Gore
10. The hapless Mitt Romney campaign
12.31.2012
Lifetime movie title generator
Just match a word from each column to come up with your own Lifetime movie title! Now you just have to cast an actress who used to be in a 1990s TV show.
| Pronoun | Adjective | Noun |
|---|---|---|
| Her | Mother's | Past |
| My | Deadly | Romance |
| The | Secret | Kidnapping |
| Their | Hidden | Stranger |
| His | Sister's | Student |
| Our | Dangerous | Sister |
There's always next season
As the season ends with a shameful fizzle for the Dallas Cowboys right on schedule, we decided to take stock of our own lackluster performance on the gridiron. We've been a member of one fantasy football league for 14 seasons now. We've never gone to the post-season, never even sniffed a championship.
Our cumulative record over these 14 season is 78-112-6, which works out to be a winning percentage of .397. Pretty good for a batter, horrible for a team sport. We lose more than we win. In fact, we almost lose two out of every three times we play.
And there isn't an obvious learning curve, either. Our worst record was 3-11, which we understandably put up in our first season when fantasy football was new to us. But then the posted that same 3-11 record in our 8th season. Our best season was our 11th, when we went 8-6. We've won 7 games only four times in 14 seasons (our 3rd, 9th, 12th, and 14th). Although maybe we are doing a little better. In the last four seasons, we've never won less than six games.
All of this obsession over a completely ridiculous waste of time that ruins Sundays more than makes Sundays enjoyable gives us a special affinity for this NFL spot that returns every winter:
In a previous post, we looked at the seven stages of fantasy football.
Our cumulative record over these 14 season is 78-112-6, which works out to be a winning percentage of .397. Pretty good for a batter, horrible for a team sport. We lose more than we win. In fact, we almost lose two out of every three times we play.
And there isn't an obvious learning curve, either. Our worst record was 3-11, which we understandably put up in our first season when fantasy football was new to us. But then the posted that same 3-11 record in our 8th season. Our best season was our 11th, when we went 8-6. We've won 7 games only four times in 14 seasons (our 3rd, 9th, 12th, and 14th). Although maybe we are doing a little better. In the last four seasons, we've never won less than six games.
All of this obsession over a completely ridiculous waste of time that ruins Sundays more than makes Sundays enjoyable gives us a special affinity for this NFL spot that returns every winter:
In a previous post, we looked at the seven stages of fantasy football.
12.30.2012
And our minivan towed the Queen Mary
Tonight we must have seen the Toyota Tundra-pulls-the shuttle commercial about 20 times. With each viewing, we grow more and more suspicious and skeptical. That little truck towed that giant, freakin' spaceship? Baloney. But Jalopnik explains how it worked. We stand corrected, Toyota.
12.28.2012
Knee-jerk review: "Django Unchained"
1. The D is silent, people.
2. "Audacious" is the word that comes to mind. Over the top.
3. And the blood, it does fly and spurt and gush and splatter. Consider yourself warned.
4. As usual, Tarantino holds his credit until after the final image, so after the last fade-to-black, audiences can get a final loud blast of cool music and then see the "Written and Directed by Quentin Tarantino" card.
5. Will Smith turned this down for something called After Earth co-starring his smug son and directed by M. Night Shymalan of all people. We'll see how that works out for him.
6. It's probably got too many endings. Just when you think it's over... here comes another 20 minutes.
7. We hate the lynching scene. You'll know the one. Way too jokey and broad for what's otherwise a dark, gritty story. We can see the appeal of making fun of racist KKK-types, but it doesn't work. Including Jonah Hill was a mistake.
8. Tarantino has a way with words, no doubt. His dialogue is sterling as always. You can see how much the actors relish those lines and long speeches.
9. Everyone's making a big deal about Don Johnson's bit part. but we were underwhelmed.
10. We have no problem with bloody, gory shoot-outs, but we get very squeamish when it comes to hand-to-hand fighting involving cracking bones. Why is that?
11. Dig that retro Columbia Pictures logo.
12. We're curious to learn more about how African-American audiences respond to this. On one hand, it's clearly a populist revenge fantasy for slaves that does for racists what Inglourious Basterds did for Nazis. But on the other hand, it's clearly got roots in seedy 1970s exploitation movies that have fun looking down on lower classes and using historical "accuracy" to allow white folks to use the N-word and sexualize the subservience of African-American slave women.
13. Some pretty random flashbacks and flashforwards, if you ask us.
14. That is one long rifle.
15. Samuel L. Jackson steals the movie and that's a tall order given the showy, scenery-chewing performances by Leonardo DiCaprio and Christoph Waltz.
16. Why make the miners Australian? And why does Tarantino still feel the need to give himself a speaking part?
17. For us, the Tarantino gold standard remains Pulp Fiction, with Inglourious Basterds a photo-finish second.
18. The ending has narrative and structural parallels, believe it or not, with Star Wars. Discuss amongst yourselves.
19. The Brittle Brothers. What a great name.
20. If you like Tarantino, go see it.
2. "Audacious" is the word that comes to mind. Over the top.
3. And the blood, it does fly and spurt and gush and splatter. Consider yourself warned.
4. As usual, Tarantino holds his credit until after the final image, so after the last fade-to-black, audiences can get a final loud blast of cool music and then see the "Written and Directed by Quentin Tarantino" card.
5. Will Smith turned this down for something called After Earth co-starring his smug son and directed by M. Night Shymalan of all people. We'll see how that works out for him.
6. It's probably got too many endings. Just when you think it's over... here comes another 20 minutes.
7. We hate the lynching scene. You'll know the one. Way too jokey and broad for what's otherwise a dark, gritty story. We can see the appeal of making fun of racist KKK-types, but it doesn't work. Including Jonah Hill was a mistake.
8. Tarantino has a way with words, no doubt. His dialogue is sterling as always. You can see how much the actors relish those lines and long speeches.
9. Everyone's making a big deal about Don Johnson's bit part. but we were underwhelmed.
10. We have no problem with bloody, gory shoot-outs, but we get very squeamish when it comes to hand-to-hand fighting involving cracking bones. Why is that?
11. Dig that retro Columbia Pictures logo.
12. We're curious to learn more about how African-American audiences respond to this. On one hand, it's clearly a populist revenge fantasy for slaves that does for racists what Inglourious Basterds did for Nazis. But on the other hand, it's clearly got roots in seedy 1970s exploitation movies that have fun looking down on lower classes and using historical "accuracy" to allow white folks to use the N-word and sexualize the subservience of African-American slave women.
13. Some pretty random flashbacks and flashforwards, if you ask us.
14. That is one long rifle.
15. Samuel L. Jackson steals the movie and that's a tall order given the showy, scenery-chewing performances by Leonardo DiCaprio and Christoph Waltz.
16. Why make the miners Australian? And why does Tarantino still feel the need to give himself a speaking part?
17. For us, the Tarantino gold standard remains Pulp Fiction, with Inglourious Basterds a photo-finish second.
18. The ending has narrative and structural parallels, believe it or not, with Star Wars. Discuss amongst yourselves.
19. The Brittle Brothers. What a great name.
20. If you like Tarantino, go see it.
12.22.2012
And to all a Cheese Fry night
In the spirit of the season, here are links to Knee-Jerks we've done over the years to those great evergreen holiday TV specials:
And as a special treat, here's a vintage 1970s spot for Dolly Madison, long the sponsor of the CBS airing of "A Charlie Brown Christmas." We will always associate Charlie Brown with the "Zinger Zapper."
Knee-jerk review: "Silver Linings Playbook"
1. Bradley Cooper is the real deal. A movie star with legitimate chops.
2. We can only guess how hard it must have been to strike the right tonal balance with this material. Funny in places, sad in others, romantic in others. Football tailgating side by side with a dance competition and therapy sessions. What a hard movie to categorize. Or explain.
3. Weird title. Probably working against it.
4. Three Kings is still our favorite David O. Russell movie. But this is a close second. Not as grim and humorless as The Fighter.
5. The next time we're in a diner with Jennifer Lawrence, we're ordering raisin bran. Genius.
6. When was the last time Robert DeNiro had this kind of meaty dramatic role? Seems like lately he's doing the "DeNiro spoof" thing where he's mostly playing off his own persona rather than creating a new character.
7. What's most compelling about the movie, to us, is the idea that just about everyone, no matter how normal and ordinary they may seem, is actually grappling with some sort of secret dysfunction or burning unhappiness. Merry Christmas, moviegoers!
8. We won't hold against it the movie's obsession with the Philadelphia Eagles... or the way the one Dallas Cowboys fan is cast as a villain.
9. Jennifer Lawrence is a real woman in an industry full mostly of scrawny girls. That's a good thing. She's a real find.
10. Excelsior.
11. Best scene is probably the discussion of psychiatric drugs that plays like two film buffs talking about movies.
12. Where's Chris Tucker been? Probably counting all his Rush Hour 3 money. He's fun here, a reminder that he can be good in very small doses.
13. Clever script in the way the backstory unfolds organically throughout the story. There is no awkward infodump of exposition to explain everything. You have to pay attention to piece everything together. This is how it's done, people.
14. Still don't like Julia Stiles. Blech. We'd be miserable married to her, too.
15. Spoiler alert: a satisfying, old-school romantic comedy ending.
16. Worth a look.
Knee-jerk review: "Red Dawn"
1. What can we say? We were curious. The 1984 original - the first movie ever rated PG-13, true story - is a something of an iconic classic for Generation X. We loved it.
2. But this remake? Not terrible. Not great, either. Mostly, it's just sort of pointless.
3. You'd think this kind of thing would really resonate in an age of American occupation where one man's freedom fighter is another man's terrorist insurgent. It's all a matter of geopolitical perspective. But this is not a very deep movie. Disappointing, but not surprising. Probably didn't help that the finished film sat on the shelf for a couple of years while MGM sorted out yet another set of financial troubles, robbing the movie of whatever meager relevance it might have had when it was made.
4. The producers' last-minute decision to use post-production CGI to make the bad guys North Korean instead of Chinese (to avoid offending that huge box office audience) is not only hilariously cowardly, but also completely implausible from a narrative perspective. Anyone who's at all familiar with the pathetic realities of North Korea knows they could never mount any sort of large-scale invasion of anything.
5. That one shot of the paratrooper parachutes drifting down out of the sky, lifted from the original, is still pretty powerful.
6. "Wolverines!"
7. Josh Peck (in the Charlie Sheen role) is apparently some kind of up-and-comer in Hollywood, but we found his scratchy-voiced, hooded-eye brand of James Dean-style brooding to be annoying and, frankly, rather douchey.
8. The movie just feels small, whereas the original had more of an epic scope to it. Or is just that as a 12-year-old in 1984, we had lower standards?
9. This despite the fact that the remake creates a new MacGuffin element that allows our heroes a clear mission to accomplish. That should have helped address the original film's rather mushy second half.
10. Adrianne Palicki. Sigh. We'd probably watch her do anything.
11. The weary cynicism of Jeffrey Dean Morgan (in the Powers Boothe role) makes the most of his handful of lines. He steals the few scenes he's in, but his character is really not much of a factor.
12. What teenaged high school guy wouldn't want the opportunity to fight a foreign army?
13. There's a lot of macho talk about making "tough choices" (i.e. fight or collaborate) but the remake skirts complex questions about the messy nature of guerrilla warfare. We're thinking of the horrible moment in the original in which our heroes realized they had a spy in their midst. The remake cleverly mutes that situation to sidestep any unpleasantness.
14. We saw it so you didn't have to. You're welcome.
2. But this remake? Not terrible. Not great, either. Mostly, it's just sort of pointless.
3. You'd think this kind of thing would really resonate in an age of American occupation where one man's freedom fighter is another man's terrorist insurgent. It's all a matter of geopolitical perspective. But this is not a very deep movie. Disappointing, but not surprising. Probably didn't help that the finished film sat on the shelf for a couple of years while MGM sorted out yet another set of financial troubles, robbing the movie of whatever meager relevance it might have had when it was made.
4. The producers' last-minute decision to use post-production CGI to make the bad guys North Korean instead of Chinese (to avoid offending that huge box office audience) is not only hilariously cowardly, but also completely implausible from a narrative perspective. Anyone who's at all familiar with the pathetic realities of North Korea knows they could never mount any sort of large-scale invasion of anything.
5. That one shot of the paratrooper parachutes drifting down out of the sky, lifted from the original, is still pretty powerful.
6. "Wolverines!"
7. Josh Peck (in the Charlie Sheen role) is apparently some kind of up-and-comer in Hollywood, but we found his scratchy-voiced, hooded-eye brand of James Dean-style brooding to be annoying and, frankly, rather douchey.
8. The movie just feels small, whereas the original had more of an epic scope to it. Or is just that as a 12-year-old in 1984, we had lower standards?
9. This despite the fact that the remake creates a new MacGuffin element that allows our heroes a clear mission to accomplish. That should have helped address the original film's rather mushy second half.
10. Adrianne Palicki. Sigh. We'd probably watch her do anything.
11. The weary cynicism of Jeffrey Dean Morgan (in the Powers Boothe role) makes the most of his handful of lines. He steals the few scenes he's in, but his character is really not much of a factor.
12. What teenaged high school guy wouldn't want the opportunity to fight a foreign army?
13. There's a lot of macho talk about making "tough choices" (i.e. fight or collaborate) but the remake skirts complex questions about the messy nature of guerrilla warfare. We're thinking of the horrible moment in the original in which our heroes realized they had a spy in their midst. The remake cleverly mutes that situation to sidestep any unpleasantness.
14. We saw it so you didn't have to. You're welcome.
11.18.2012
Knee-jerk review: "Skyfall"
* Casino Royale is still the best Daniel Craig Bond movie.
* The first 90 minutes here are dynamite... so we thought Casino Royale was about to be dethroned, but then the movie takes a very odd detour for the climax. It's somewhat unsatisfying, even if it makes sense from a thematic perspective.
* Real men do scorpion shots.
* Albert Finney? Seriously? It's like he's walking in from some other movie. Worse, it's like he's walking in from some other movie parody.
* We love movies where there's a footchase through crowds of people. Nothing cooler than a hero shoving aside clueless bystanders as he's sprinting past.
* Our fellow moviegoer made the point that the Craig movies are steeped in psychology. Which is precisely the point, post-Jason Bourne. This is not your father's empty-headed spy caper. This "blunt instrument" Bond has angst. Indeed, this movie's exploration of the M/Bond surrogate mother/son relationship adds a nice layer of emotion we weren't expecting.
* Yeah, the Adele heme song is good. But let's all back away from the suggestion that it's the best Bond song ever. "Live and Let Die" owns that title until ever.
* Komodo dragon fu.
* That is one disgusting rat story.
* Ralph Fiennes is always a welcome presence.
* The idea of a broken-down James Bond was explored sort-of in Die Another Day when Pierce Brosnan languished in a North Korean prison, but it's taken to more plausible, dramatic extremes here.
* Aston Martin fu. (With some much appreciated Goldfinger references.)
* Always good when the villain seems rational and logical in his villainous thinking, rather than deranged and irrational. Helps also, of course, that Javier Bardem is playing him.
* It's a long-standing Bond film tradition: one of the pretty actresses you've never heard of gets killed by the villain midway through to prove that he's ruthless and evil. Look it up. Just about every Bond movie follows this model.
* We also love movies set in the sleek, glass-and-neon cityscapes of Asia. The Shanghai sequence here is beautiful to look at. Like a manga.
* "Take the bloody shot."
* Cool title. Lame in-movie explanation for the title, however.
* Miss Moneypenny was never that hot. We like.
* When we heard there's a big third act twist, we had an idea what would happen. We were right.
* Does this mean Bond grew up with money? Is that part of the Ian Fleming canon?
* For the record, Quantum of Solace, to us, seems unfairly denigrated by fans and critics. It's not that bad. Victim of the last big writer's strike.
* James Bond's hobby is "resurrection." What a cool line.
* Worth seeing, yes.
* The first 90 minutes here are dynamite... so we thought Casino Royale was about to be dethroned, but then the movie takes a very odd detour for the climax. It's somewhat unsatisfying, even if it makes sense from a thematic perspective.
* Real men do scorpion shots.
* Albert Finney? Seriously? It's like he's walking in from some other movie. Worse, it's like he's walking in from some other movie parody.
* We love movies where there's a footchase through crowds of people. Nothing cooler than a hero shoving aside clueless bystanders as he's sprinting past.
* Our fellow moviegoer made the point that the Craig movies are steeped in psychology. Which is precisely the point, post-Jason Bourne. This is not your father's empty-headed spy caper. This "blunt instrument" Bond has angst. Indeed, this movie's exploration of the M/Bond surrogate mother/son relationship adds a nice layer of emotion we weren't expecting.
* Yeah, the Adele heme song is good. But let's all back away from the suggestion that it's the best Bond song ever. "Live and Let Die" owns that title until ever.
* Komodo dragon fu.
* That is one disgusting rat story.
* Ralph Fiennes is always a welcome presence.
* The idea of a broken-down James Bond was explored sort-of in Die Another Day when Pierce Brosnan languished in a North Korean prison, but it's taken to more plausible, dramatic extremes here.
* Aston Martin fu. (With some much appreciated Goldfinger references.)
* Always good when the villain seems rational and logical in his villainous thinking, rather than deranged and irrational. Helps also, of course, that Javier Bardem is playing him.
* It's a long-standing Bond film tradition: one of the pretty actresses you've never heard of gets killed by the villain midway through to prove that he's ruthless and evil. Look it up. Just about every Bond movie follows this model.
* We also love movies set in the sleek, glass-and-neon cityscapes of Asia. The Shanghai sequence here is beautiful to look at. Like a manga.
* "Take the bloody shot."
* Cool title. Lame in-movie explanation for the title, however.
* Miss Moneypenny was never that hot. We like.
* When we heard there's a big third act twist, we had an idea what would happen. We were right.
* Does this mean Bond grew up with money? Is that part of the Ian Fleming canon?
* For the record, Quantum of Solace, to us, seems unfairly denigrated by fans and critics. It's not that bad. Victim of the last big writer's strike.
* James Bond's hobby is "resurrection." What a cool line.
* Worth seeing, yes.
10.18.2012
Knee-jerk review: "Argo"
1. While we admit to having a special fondness for sweaty political thrillers, that doesn't change the fact that this movie is something of a masterpiece.
2. Yeah, you read that right.
3. Who would have thought that a rather bland, smug actor like Ben Affleck could evolve into so confident and efficient a filmmaker? We loved Gone Baby Gone, liked The Town (it was a little long), but Argo is his finest to date. It's becoming a fact that if Affleck directed a movie, you know it'll be good. It just doesn't make sense. But it's completely true.
4. We knew how this story ended, but the climax was still almost unbearably suspenseful.
5. Alan Arkin is a national treasure. Period.
6. Dig those 1979 wardrobes, man. Plus, everyone smokes!
7. If you want to know more about this dark chapter of American history, read Mark Bowden's Guests of the Ayatollah. Fascinating, meticulous examination of the experiences of the American hostages.
8. It's hard to imagine people volunteering for these kinds of CIA jobs where it's not an exaggeration to say that they may not come back.
9. The character arc of one of the hostages is completely predictable... and also completely effective. Sometimes cliches are cliches because they work.
10. The opening sequence depicting the storming of the U.S. Embassy in Tehran is chilling.
11. Bonus points for employing the old oval "W" 1970s-era Warner Bros. logo to open the movie.
12. We have vague recollections of this whole hostage crisis from when we were kids. There was always that scary stock image used again and again of the one hostage with the big bandage wrapped around his face as a blindfold. Those people were held for what seemed like forever to us, with the newscasts happily keeping count of the days in captivity.
13. The film is mostly about the brazen operation to extract ("exfil" in the movie's lingo) the hiding diplomats, but it certainly doesn't shy away from suggesting the complicated, ambiguous nature of American foreign policy in the Middle East and the way old choices can become new problems.
14. "This is the best bad idea we have, sir."
15. Four stars. Go see it.
2. Yeah, you read that right.
3. Who would have thought that a rather bland, smug actor like Ben Affleck could evolve into so confident and efficient a filmmaker? We loved Gone Baby Gone, liked The Town (it was a little long), but Argo is his finest to date. It's becoming a fact that if Affleck directed a movie, you know it'll be good. It just doesn't make sense. But it's completely true.
4. We knew how this story ended, but the climax was still almost unbearably suspenseful.
5. Alan Arkin is a national treasure. Period.
6. Dig those 1979 wardrobes, man. Plus, everyone smokes!
7. If you want to know more about this dark chapter of American history, read Mark Bowden's Guests of the Ayatollah. Fascinating, meticulous examination of the experiences of the American hostages.
8. It's hard to imagine people volunteering for these kinds of CIA jobs where it's not an exaggeration to say that they may not come back.
9. The character arc of one of the hostages is completely predictable... and also completely effective. Sometimes cliches are cliches because they work.
10. The opening sequence depicting the storming of the U.S. Embassy in Tehran is chilling.
11. Bonus points for employing the old oval "W" 1970s-era Warner Bros. logo to open the movie.
12. We have vague recollections of this whole hostage crisis from when we were kids. There was always that scary stock image used again and again of the one hostage with the big bandage wrapped around his face as a blindfold. Those people were held for what seemed like forever to us, with the newscasts happily keeping count of the days in captivity.
13. The film is mostly about the brazen operation to extract ("exfil" in the movie's lingo) the hiding diplomats, but it certainly doesn't shy away from suggesting the complicated, ambiguous nature of American foreign policy in the Middle East and the way old choices can become new problems.
14. "This is the best bad idea we have, sir."
15. Four stars. Go see it.
10.17.2012
Knee-jerk review: AMC's "The Walking Dead"
1. We love zombies. We just can't believe that so many other people love zombies. This premiere scored the biggest TV ratings of the season. Including broadcast networks. That isn't supposed to happen, not in a world where cable shows must usually be content with tiny ratings. But this is a monster (pun maybe intended) hit.
2. Who's this cute blonde girl in the group? We assume she's a Herschel Daughter, but we don't remember seeing her before. We understand why little Carl would be smitten.
3. A fairly grim opening, showing our heroes existing in a hollowed-eye state of exhaustion and barely-hanging-on survival. It looked like little Carl was about to eat dog food, for crying out loud.
4. Could you take a hatchet to someone's leg? Even if you had to?
5. Lori remains annoying. We can't even stop ourselves from irrationally blaming her for being pregnant during a zombie outbreak and causing all of this extra trouble for everyone.
6. Doesn't Daryl get tired of pointing that crossbow? It looks really, really heavy.
7. What's the deal with Michonne's zombie pets? Is there a purpose other than to look like a bad-ass?
8. At some point, we really should read the comic. We know that.
9. This was probably the most bloody and gory episode of the whole series. Exhibit A: that one zombie dude whose skin got peeled off its skull. Yuck.
10. We were wondering about the ammunition supply.
11. "This isn't a democracy."
10.13.2012
Knee-jerk review: ABC's "Nashville"
1. Well, now that was interesting.
2. It has the hallmarks of a "Desperate Housewives"-style women-centric soap opera, what with the complicated romantic triangles and problems-with-bring-rich hand-wringing and the snarky woman-on-woman insults. All that plus seedy politics and unrequited love tragedy. We smell a winner.
3. But there's also a grit and realism here that lends a degree of gravity. This isn't perhaps the four-star genius "The Good Wife," but it isn't self-conscious fluff.
4. You probably don't have to like country music to enjoy the show, but it certainly helps.
5. And you can imagine the music-license goldmine ABC stands to enjoy if this show takes off and spawns iTunes singles. The one presumably original song in the pilot was catchy.
6. Honestly, we didn't think Hayden Panettiere had it in her. She worked it. Who knew Claire-bear could so convincingly play a maneater?
7. Powers Boothe, as always, cuts a commanding presence, even with the sorta girly cosmetic work he's apparently had done.
8. Makes us want to visit the Bluebird Cafe.
9. Part of the fun is trying to work out which real-life music star the fictional characters are emulating. If she's Taylor Swift and she's Reba McEntire, then who's the other girl? That kind of thing.
9. It's a tough lesson in Hollywood: you're only as good as your last project. What have you done for me lately? Second tough lesson: there's always someone younger and hungrier waiting backstage.
10. You really can't ask for more from a drama than to feel immersed in a strange world, whether it's the hospital of "ER" or the White House of "The West Wing" or the small-town football locker room of "Friday Night Lights." This show offers what seems to be a genuine glimpse at the inner workings of the Nashville music scene. It feels genuine anyway.
11. Connie Britton, it seems, can do no wrong.
12. Bonus points for the involvement of Callie Khouri, screenwriter of one our most favorite films, the brilliant Thelma and Louise.
13. Solid.
2. It has the hallmarks of a "Desperate Housewives"-style women-centric soap opera, what with the complicated romantic triangles and problems-with-bring-rich hand-wringing and the snarky woman-on-woman insults. All that plus seedy politics and unrequited love tragedy. We smell a winner.
3. But there's also a grit and realism here that lends a degree of gravity. This isn't perhaps the four-star genius "The Good Wife," but it isn't self-conscious fluff.
4. You probably don't have to like country music to enjoy the show, but it certainly helps.
5. And you can imagine the music-license goldmine ABC stands to enjoy if this show takes off and spawns iTunes singles. The one presumably original song in the pilot was catchy.
6. Honestly, we didn't think Hayden Panettiere had it in her. She worked it. Who knew Claire-bear could so convincingly play a maneater?
7. Powers Boothe, as always, cuts a commanding presence, even with the sorta girly cosmetic work he's apparently had done.
8. Makes us want to visit the Bluebird Cafe.
9. Part of the fun is trying to work out which real-life music star the fictional characters are emulating. If she's Taylor Swift and she's Reba McEntire, then who's the other girl? That kind of thing.
9. It's a tough lesson in Hollywood: you're only as good as your last project. What have you done for me lately? Second tough lesson: there's always someone younger and hungrier waiting backstage.
10. You really can't ask for more from a drama than to feel immersed in a strange world, whether it's the hospital of "ER" or the White House of "The West Wing" or the small-town football locker room of "Friday Night Lights." This show offers what seems to be a genuine glimpse at the inner workings of the Nashville music scene. It feels genuine anyway.
11. Connie Britton, it seems, can do no wrong.
12. Bonus points for the involvement of Callie Khouri, screenwriter of one our most favorite films, the brilliant Thelma and Louise.
13. Solid.
10.01.2012
Knee-jerk review: CBS' "Elementary"
1. If ever a network was a perfect fit for a Sherlock Holmes "re-imagining," its CBS, a company that never met a string of pretty female corpses it didn't want to build an show around.
2. When you're dealing with Sherlock Holmes, casting the lead character is pretty important. And Johnny Lee Miller does a pretty good job. He's clearly having fun.
3. But the show is very... simple. There are plenty of clever bits where Holmes gets to show off his powers of observation and deduction (and isn't this the same gimmick as "The Mentalist"?), but no real surprises.
4. It's the TV equivalent of a airport paperback. You know what you're getting and mostly just hope the execution is competent and mildly diverting. Which it is.
5. The most interesting thing about the show is the suggestion of Holmes and Watson's dark, damaged substance-abuse, foiled-career pasts.
6. Lucy Liu seems to be an acquired taste. The only thing in which we ever really liked her was "Southland" last season.
7. Don't even get us started on the notion that this outside consultant can have this kind of free reign over NYPD resources. We don't care how well you know Aidan Quinn.
8. A quietly decent little show, but we get the gist. We don't have to watch it again to know how it all turns out.
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